Dying Battery Blues

Dying smoke detectors will beep beep beep.
This of course while I was trying to sleep.
I heard it dying, yet beeping away.
Saying, “Your wife should have fixed this yesterday.”

Simple fix – she took the battery out.
But then the alarm began to pout.
Pouting is a long anguished scream.
It is worse than a battery out of steam.

No more napping time will it allow
It wants a battery and it wants it now.
We had an extra one on hand.
Or it would be buried in the sand.

Everyone else went back to bed.
I will go to work sleepy instead.
The smoke alarm doesn’t make a peep.
Which is certainly better than beep beep beep.

Wikipedia the Poet

Editor’s Note: The last sentence of the opening section of five random Wikipedia articles, broken into lines. Imagined art.

For the first time since 2007,
and for only the third time
in the Bowl Championship Series era,
no team from an automatic-qualifying
BCS conference finished the
season with an undefeated record.

During that time,
a list of organisms was compiled
which included land and freshwater mollusks.
46 species of snails and slugs 
(non-marine gastropods) were found,
as well as 20 species of freshwater bivalves,
freshwater clams and mussels.

A Perfect Night to Go to China 
is a novel by David Gilmour,
published in 2005.
It won the 2005 Governor General’s Award 
for English-language fiction.

Its population as of
the 2010 Census was 75;
down from 112 recorded
in the 2002 Census.

Aegialeus (Ancient Greek: Αἰγιαλεύς) was
the fifth strategos (elected general)
of the Achaean League in Ancient Greece
who served for only a year, 242–241 BC.

Articles:

  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2011_NCAA_Division_I_FBS_football_season
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_non-marine_mollusks_of_the_Indiana_Dunes
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Perfect_Night_to_Go_to_China
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yuryakh-Kyuyore
  • https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aegialeus_(strategos)

Old School

This is old school writing.
It is how I learned to write.
It is probably not for the
“younger generation.”

I write my thoughts.
Sometimes they rhyme.
People read my thoughts.
Sometimes they complain.

Nowadays, this should not
Just be words in stanzas.
There should be a video.
It would have me reading.

I would read the poem.
This way, you can just listen.
While you listen,
You can see me.

Nobody wants that.
Maybe just the words
Scrolling on the screen.
A lyric poem.

Watching it takes longer
Than just reading it.
Plus, before the video,
You can see an ad or two.

Also, the rest of the page
Should have stories about
My life, my wife, my dogs.
Anything that inspired me.

I am sorry, but I am old.
You do not have to film words.
You do not have to read to me.
I can read it by myself.

Work Day

I need my lunch.
I have to pee.
I need a break.
I need coffee.

We’ve been conferencing
Since nine this morn.
It seems like it’s been
Since I was born.

There can’t be this much to do.
There can’t be more slides.
I want to stretch my legs.
I want off my backsides.

Amen.

Watching My Weight

Spicy fried chicken.
A breast, leg and thigh.
Mashed potatoes,
A fried apple pie.

Triple bacon burger,
Double cheese.
A large side of fries.
My heart won’t seize.

Chicago pizza.
That thick, thick crust.
Extra sausage.
It’s a must.

At last a drink,
So I don’t choke.
I’ll wash it down
With Diet Coke.

Oncor Haikus

Notes from the author: Woke up this morning, having trouble breathing. Looked up to check the time, and my projection clock was out. That’s when I realized my breathing issues were because my CPAP was not running. Took off my mask, and watched as the ceiling fan spun slowly to a stop. The power is out again.


Warmness engulfs me.
Ceiling fans no longer run.
Power out again.


Bleeding quietly.
I was shaving in the dark.
Blades of danger.


Messages flowing.
Oncor status emails sent.
Email needs Internet.


Living in darkness.
My world is in the shadows.
I am powerless.