Editor’s Note: From 2002, but the emails just started again.

Twice a week or more
I get e-mail in my box
Gonna change my life
Meet me a Russian fox

Russian E-mail Bride
Now I can’t let go
She don’t know much English
So she can’t say ‘no’

My friends all tell me
That she’s the best.
She wrestles with the weak ones,
And out-drinks the rest.

Russian E-Mail Bride,
Won’t you please call home?
I have a fifth of vodka
But I’m all alone.